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on Thursday, June 16, 2005 at 09:27:34, nash wrote: Sandy
Of course you are right when you say that if a dancer is selling sex, then the guys are buying sex. I've always known that and for the once in a while that I go to a club just to have some fun, none of this has ever bothered me.
It's that I have totally become hung up on this girl. All of a sudden I'm watching someone I really care about getting intimate with strangers and it makes whatever we have together seem so unimportant and not as special as I want it to be. That's the issue for me. In my head I know she must care about me or why bother seeing me outside the club, but it really upsets me to know she is available for any guy with some cash.
Like you, she is also putting herself through college and has told me she needs the money and actually likes the job so why not keep doing it? I'm not going to try to tell her what she can or can't do but I can't help wondering what affect this job has on a woman's psyche. Is it possible for you to actually like and care about guys after being watched and groped all day by strangers?
If you met a guy and had something special going with him and you knew your job upset him, would you be willing to walk away from it? Not because he said you had to but because you cared enough about him.
I want to hang in there and make this work. Do you think I should just keep getting to know her better and be cool about my feelings until the relationship gets more serious?
Nash
I think that guys don't really have the right to ask a dancer to quit dancing and the reason is because you knew what she did before you got involved. Its not fair for her to quit making money just because of your insecurities. Shes going to college. Which means that one day she won't have to dance anymore and she got an eduction. Why is it that men like the idea of the fantasy but when you bring it home everything changes? Just be glad that you even got a dancer to give you the time of day. For that you should be grateful. Its not everyday that we dancers deide to date out of the club. You must be someone special to her. Enjoy the moment and forget about what you don't like about her job. Just think about all the things that make it worth the while. |